50 Ways to Annoy Fred and George Weasley
by InsanelyWitchyMango
Summary: Alice is back in annoyance, a label that will never stop being hilarious. The newest line, and far by the most daring of missions: the Annoyers and Big Daddy of Pranking Duos; Fred and George Weasley. A challenge is always fun. T for later chapters/constant vigilance. R&E&R!
1. Pranksting

**Thank you, everyone, for waiting so patiently and especially to those who reviewed my other stories. I'd especially like to thank the person who brought Alice's attention to the two people she just had to annoy. Bouncing with excitement, people. IWM Presents: ****_50 WAYS TO ANNOY FRED AND GEORGE_**

**Yes, I dare.**

"MU-UM!", two identical voices berated the ears of all present at the reconstructed Burrow dining table, and one of the two twins stomped downstairs. His arrival was greeted with fist-in-mouth laughing from Harry, Percy, Hermione, Ron, Bill, Ginny, Charlie, and not very well suppressed from Arthur and Molly. Just as the one twin glares and laughter subsided, the second of the Weasley twins stomped down the stairs, entirely identical to the first except for the missing ear that should have been on the side of his head.

The laughter renewed, and the twin glares were glared at each other, both ignoring their audience as they stared each other down.

"George"

"Fred"

"Mum!", Fred broke out, turning to Molly Weasley, who quickly composed herself, "George dyed my hair green!"

"No, I didn't!", George broke in, also turning to the spur of the moment judge, "He turned my hair silver!"

"He just turned his hair silver because he was trying to cover it up!"

"That trick is so old only you'd use it!"

"Don't deny that you bedazzled my robes!"

"And don't you deny that you glued a dung bomb to the back of my head with a note about how much of a brain fart I am!"

Fred opened his mouth and closed it again before speaking again, "That's actually really good. I should have thought of that. But I didn't"

Molly immediately turned to look at all of her children accusingly as Fred and George also continued to accuse each other, occassionally throwing in a compliment on the execution of the prank, along with some criticism and trash talk.

All of the redheads met with Molly's gaze shook their heads, indicating that none of them had done anything. Hermione spoke, and Fred and George both turned to listen to her, closing their mouths, glaring at each other.

"If no one in the house did it, especially not a Weasley, I can only think of one other person who would"

"Wouldn't I like to know who did", Ron glanced at the twins, particularly their hair, "Congratulate them for being bloody mad"

Before Molly could start to shriek at Ron for language, Harry interrupted, "I think I know who you're talking about"

"Who was it?", Fred and George spoke in unison, a habit they had never tried to break.

"Get ready for a lot more of that", Ron smiled the twins. For a second there was a silent but distinct sound of gears turning before smiles split upon everyone's faces excluding the twins.

"I doubt that", George dismissed the very notion with a wave of his hand.

"She wouldn't dare", Fred scoffed.

"It does seem to be the sort of thing she'd do, you know"

"And she's already gotten all three of us", Hermione nodded to Harry and Ron, "As well as Snape, and probably more. You never know how mad a person is"

It took a few more arguments and alibis before the twins were convinced, and when they were, another sound berated the ears of all in the Burrow and beyond.

"ALICE!"

_Pop!_

"You called?"

**I hope you guys are happy at how long I made it. I don't want to do this, but I'd love if we could manage maybe at least two or three reviews per chapter, but I will be updating no matter what. R&E&R, my lovelies!**


	2. Stealing Pt1

I beside the door, my annoyance barely concealed even under the Disillusionment charm, and waited.

And waited.

And waited...

That is, until Molly Weasley, a saving grace with red hair, yelled from downstairs, "Fred and George, if you do not come down this instant, you aren't getting any food!"

There was a loud bang inside the room, several loud cusses and a small, easily lost-in-all-the-noise click, and the door opened, the Weasley twins running out, still cussing and grumbling, but running as though it was their lifelines that were being thrown away and not their food.

I grinned and immediately went into the room, my smile only getting wider as I heard Molly Weasley yell at Fred and George for swearing "Like bloody sea born sailors", her words, not mine. I waved the smoke away before squating down to critically look at the small pod on the floor, and cautiously picked it up, and with even greater caution, licked it.

Just what I needed. I pocketed it, tapped my head to lift the Disillusionment spell and idly walked around to pass the time as I looked around at the pranking products scattered everywhere, imperfected.

Within the half hour, the Weasley twins were getting back upstairs, and both stopped at the doorway.

"Shit"

"Do you do the synchronizing thing a lot?", I asked, tossing an opaque chine container into the air. With several other curses, probably with a spell mixed in, the china container stayed suspended in air.

It seemed to occur to them that I may have broken some other things, and a frantic search ensued, my question not answered. I was seriously concerned that the synchronization thing might get a bit old. Wouldn't want the readers to get bored.

"George", Fred said, his voice strangely horse, looking at the hole in the carpet where the pod had been, "Did you happen to move the project?"

"No", George walked across the room, "Why?"

"Because it's not here"

The twins immediately turned to me.

"I moved it, as a matter of fact!", I waved cheerily before showing them the pod, "Aren't you proud of my bravery and stupidity? It was Gryffindor worthy"

"ALICE!"

"Again, the synchronization", I chastised before pocketing the pod.

_Poof_

**Hi, my lovely readers! If you can figure out the reference to another fandom I made in here when Alice steals the pod, internet cookies! R&E&R**


	3. Stealing Pt 2

**Hello, my lovelies! I got a Wattpad account, wanna check it out? The link's on my profile, and I'll be writing a book starting September. R&E&R!**

I tossed the pod from hand to hand, looking at it curiously. To be honest, I had no flipping idea what it was. Rule number one of annoying the Weasley twins was taking away the thing they seemed most immediately interested in, and a small seed that could burn through carpets and fill a room with green smoke was certainly interesting. Wait...

"Green Smoke", I grinned, tossing it one last time and looking at it as it still emitted smoke, "That's interesting, indeed"

The next day, I got into the Gryffindor Common Room early and took the coveted seat nearest to the fireplace. The common room slowly filled up, chatter informing me so without me so much as having to turn my back. You see, this is why talking is good. It's better for the lazy and muscularly challenged.

The Weasley twins entered the common room with a scream and a dungbomb, which was also good for my undisturbed laziness and challenged muscles. "Show time", I muttered to myself.

A deerstalker hat and wooden pipe completed the look and I with a dramatic, conspiratorial and entirely useless look around, I dropped the pod into the pipe.

In case you've never tried dressing up like Sherlock Holmes with a green smoking pipe in a red colored room, then it attracts a lot of stares and attention. Particularly if there's a certain set of Weasley twins looking for something smoking and green.

However, they decided to use tact. And logic is my downfall.

They cornered me into the chair, "Give us the pod"

"The unison thing", I replied, taking the pipe out of my mouth and in what I hoped was a discreet movement, inched it towards my side, "Just... no"

"And why are you wearing that hat?", one of them, the one with red hair asked.

"It looks like a death frisbee", the other one with the red hair commented.

I couldn't resist putting the pipe back into my mouth, "Because I deduct that the both of you are...", I trailed off, met with expectant looks.

Damn it.

"Looking for this!", in a split second decision, I pulled the pod out of the pipe and threw it into the fireplace.

Their mad lunge for it was futile as the flames devoured the green little pod, which momentarily turned the flames green, "ALICE!", they turned on me.

"I deduct an apparation about now"

And what do you know?

_POOF!_

I was right.

**I'm finding it a bit hard to find ideas for annoying the Weasley twins, so any suggestions? R&E&R, my lovelies!**


End file.
